Joel Stepanek

“The glorified body of Christ still bears the marks of the crucifixion.” A friend offered a reflection to me several years ago and I recall it often. It helps me make sense of my story.

I grew up in a loving Catholic family. We were not a lower-middle class family but the expansion of our city grew affluent neighborhoods around us. As a result, I was often on the outside at school, which is really hard when you are young. I decided that I would try to earn the affirmation of others by making really stupid decisions. I hated feeling alone and didn’t care how I obtained friendship, as long as I found it.

I thought this would make me happy, but it didn’t.

Jesus invited me into a deeper relationship with him in high school, in the middle of a very difficult time. I was not the person that I wanted to be or that God called me to be. Jesus spoke truth into dark areas of my life and through places where I was wounded he showed me His mercy and love.

The journey has been one of learning how to find Jesus in my wounds. In college I was diagnosed with major depression and later on with a general anxiety disorder. Those are difficult parts of my story and are fueled by much of what happened to me in my childhood, but perhaps some biology as well. I’ve often asked God to take those things away.

But then I recall that the glorified body of Christ bore the wounds of the crucifixion. Perhaps these are the places where God is saving me; these are the places I can encounter his love - not just through prayer but through counselors, therapists, and the community of support I have found in others who bear those wounds.

They are a reminder that there is resurrection and hope and that, despite what has been in the past, Jesus offers healing and a vision for the future. My story is ongoing and I am so blessed for what God has done, is doing, and will do.

I am blessed to be on this journey with my wife, Colleen, and my two children Elijah and Sophia who are incredible and show me who God is every day. I get to speak and write about Jesus and share the love of God I have found in him. I travel internationally to share about discipleship, leadership, and the profound link between them that is humility.

That same humility that allows us to see that the wounds of Christ are not there to remind us of his death, but to proclaim the triumph of our savior over it and herald our salvation, as well.