Emily Mentock

Looking back now, throughout my wandering years, I was never actually as far from God as I thought I was. I went to Catholic school from kindergarten through college. My family never missed Mass on Sundays. I encountered some really wonderful teachers and role models in the faith along the way. But my heart was far from the Lord. In college, especially, I struggled a lot with my faith and became very disconnected from it. I filled my life with other, more fleeting joys — some good, some not so good. But little more than a year after college, I realized that I was fully living the life that I “wanted” but something was still missing.

Around that time, I encountered a video from Word On Fire that someone I followed on Twitter had shared. I watched it, and then another. And over the next few weeks became very intrigued by Bishop Barron and his bold proclamation of the faith. I started listening to his homily podcast and eventually decided (by God’s grace) to go back to Mass and then confession. I also read Laudato Si’ (it came out that year) and that gave me a completely new perspective on Church teaching. The way Pope Francis explains our interconnectedness and interdependence inspired me to make some radical changes in my life and really made our faith tangible and more real to me in terms of how I live it out on a daily basis. Within a year of my conversion, I discerned that I was being called to give my gifts back to God in service of digital media projects in the Church.

The most consistent thing that Jesus has taught me is his enduring love. Jesus has never let me down when I have turned to Him. And I have learned more and more how much I need Him. In the first years of my conversion, I thought it was “mine” — my choice, my discovery. But every year that goes by, I see more and more how it was God’s work and God’s plan.