Dylan Michael
LAZARUS - the man who came back to life by the word of Jesus.
On September 4th 2016, 3 days before my 16th birthday, I found myself on pilgrimage in Assisi with my dad. The 10 hours that I spent in the town of St. Francis woke me up in a way that changed my life forever. Growing up in a very charismatic Catholic family, youth ministry became second nature to me through the exposure of my family, and my community from @jycanada. In my first 2 years of high school, I would organize parish youth groups and lead worship, just like my older brother before me. It was all great vibes in the fellowship as I was growing in my knowledge of the faith, but something was missing at the centre of it all. I started feeling this emptiness more and more into the summer of 2016, and my focus began to drift to the worldly things in my life.
Right before the 11th grade, when I was getting ready to call it quits in ministry, God worked in my dad to spontaneously take me to tour Italy. In Assisi, I was overwhelmed by the sight of Francis’ abandonment in following Christ, and I received the sacrament of confession and as I prayed next to his tomb. At that moment I was moved in a way that I can’t describe, as the reality of the Passion of Christ took hold in my heart and the truth of eternal life in heaven became real to me. As I prayed with these revelations, the 3 words that God spoke to Francis began to echo in my ears: “Build, my, church”. I didn’t at all know what it would look like, but it became clear then that God had called me to give my WHOLE life to Him - whatever form it takes. Sainthood was now the only thing that mattered.
This clarity was my Lazarus moment, in that I was spiritually reborn with a new peace, and a new purpose. The first insight that hit me was that of the priesthood, and this scary thought which I assumed would’ve been a quick phase, has led me now to my second year in St. Augustine’s Seminary as I continue to discern a vocation to the priesthood. The second insight was to share my zeal through the gift of music; creating Christian hip hop music (as I took the name of Lazarus), and growing a worship ministry with throneway ministries.
I wish I could tell you that when I came home from Assisi I was a perfect saint from that day forward, but the truth is that God has taken me through a new wave of challenges and struggles that He’s still using to bring me closer and closer to Him. The deeper the struggle, the deeper I’ve been able to find hope in Jesus daily in the Blessed Sacrament. I needed to be revived that day to see that the only fulfilment on earth is in Jesus - not any relationship, any hobby, any addiction. Accepting my human emptiness has given me a peace deeper than anything of this world and no matter what happens, I have no worries because my trust is now in Him. My YES is now in Him, and Him alone.
“I HAVE SAID THIS TO YOU, THAT IN ME YOU MAY HAVE PEACE. IN THE WORLD YOU HAVE TRIBULATION; BUT BE OF GOOD CHEER, I HAVE OVERCOME THE WORLD.”
“UNTIL YOU’VE GOT TO PICK UP THAT CROSS THAT YOU CAN’T CARRY, AND HE PICKS IT UP FOR YOU AND CARRIES YOU AND THE CROSS, THEN YOU KNOW.”