Luke Schonberger

 
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My story is one of the Lord always having a presence in my life but similar to the prophet Jonah, I was fearful of what the Lord was asking and ran from Him and His call until I could resist Him no longer and He swallowed me up in the "belly of the whale" and sent me on my mission once again.

I grew up in a devoutly Catholic family as the oldest of 7 children and was taught the faith by my parents and so at a very young age I had a deep and innocent relationship with Jesus. In fact, for the first 10 years of my life, it was peaceful and without any major tribulation. The Lord used those years to instill into my heart a real faith and knowledge that He exists and is Lord over everything and everyone.

But then, the tests started coming. Little by little, the Lord allowed satan to attack my family as a whole and individually. Mental illness, health issues, mortal sin, and a creeping division between my parents started to become more and more prevalent. Through all of these things my faith was still there but I started to become lured by the world's promise of power, comfort, and pleasure.

Then the major blow occurred. My parents separated one month before I was leaving to university when I was 18 years old. This absolutely crushed me. I felt a mix of deep sadness, heartbreak, and utter rage. I was so mad at my parents that when I left for my first year I didn't come home until Christmas. I felt so powerless at home that I did all I could do to take power for myself and I fully embraced the party lifestyle that university life promotes. I became a user of drugs and alcohol and did everything the world told me would make me happy. At first, I was fooled into thinking that they did. But as the years went on, I realized I had nothing. I had no true real friendships based on love and wanting the best for each other, I had no joy, no love in my heart, and a lot of wasted time and deep sadness in my heart.

So I took an honest look at my life and came to the conclusion that none of this was God's fault but mine instead. And I knew what I had to do. I had to forgive my parents and others that had hurt and used me, forgive myself for throwing the gift of my life away, and start asking God to make me a good man. That was the start of when I started seeking Him and then everything changed from there.

Once you open the door of your heart just a little, God will take that and use it to abundantly bless you in ways you didn't think were possible for such a sinner like you. This is what He did, He is a Father that never gives up. I started to ask for humility to break my pride (dangerous prayer to pray by the way because the Lord surely answers it lol), forgiveness to break my anger, and hope to break my sadness. I started to attend Mass on a regular basis, go to confession, quit my addictions, and turn from my bad friendships. Jesus provided me the graces to accomplish these feats and He gave me such peace and joy that I had not experienced since I was a little child. I also asked Him to send me my vocation and made myself open to whatever He may ask of me and shortly after, I met this beautiful lovely woman named Jamie and we started to journey in faith together and a year later started to date (and are still together to this day). God has taught me through all of these blessings/experiences how to grow in virtue and to start becoming a good man.

My life still has its hardships, sorrows, heartbreaks, anxieties, failures, temptations, and weaknesses, but this time I am not choosing to face it alone. I am choosing to accept all that comes to me with patience and humility and while embracing Jesus my Lord and Saviour and letting Him fight the battles I cannot. I surrender wholly to Jesus Christ. Amen.

 
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Conchita Dsouza